Entry 5, confirmation, tears, and surprise

Well let's deal with the surprise first. I recdeived an email this mroning from God tv, which started of by stating what I already knew that Todd Bently was taking a break, or had been instructed too by the fresh fire leaders. What surprised me, was that God tv, have then decided to stop showing the meetings on the tv. They are only going to show highlights.


Surely if this is a move of God then it doesn't matter who is spekaing, but if God is at the centre of it, then it shouldn't just be about showing meetings when Todd Bently is there.

I will be emailing God tv, with these thoughts, and hoping that they change thir minds on this, because the stopping of showing meetings on the tv live, starts to indicate that for them it was all about Todd Bently, and I hope, and I pray, that this is not the case, for He himself said, that the meetings were not about him, and people should not come to see him, but to meet with God.

Confirmation:

Have heard a lot this week about release, and impartation to others. I have felt a freal confirmation about soem stuff that we wanted to do with RolltheRock, so look out in the next few weeks for something new.

Tears:

This is confession time, and openness of the heart surgery kind.

Before coming out here, one of my favourite worship songs, ws I am Free, but every time we have sung that song this week, all I can do is cry. tears jsut drip down my face, and I can hardly get the words out of my mouth.

I am beginning to realise a little bit why, and I think it is largely due to the fact that RolltheRock is small, based around me, which is not what I wanted, I want it to be based around God, and also the fact that I had felt threatened by various things, and had fear about various things recently.

And I beleive that through the confirmation, and the battle that I am fighting to sing those words, god is releasing me, and the fear is going, and the understanding that what God has called into place, noone can pull apart.

It is so frustrating though, as all I want to do is sing those words.

A realisation of freedom is taking place, and again, a third person now within a week has told me that there is authority in the spirit in me, and I need to take that, and beleive in it, and begin to function in it.

What that authority is, I don't think I fully know, but all I know is that I have laid down RolltheRock a number of times to God since being in Florida, and every time he gives me the same vision and picture, so I am accepting that and excited about returning to Harrogate and moving forward in that.

One final thought, at 3.05 pm us time, 8.05 in the evening, British time, today is 28 years to the day when I was registered blind, wouldn't it just be amazing, a fantastic testiment to God, if the 11th of July was remembered for something miraculous rather than something being taken away.